Thursday, September 23, 2010

Squirrel Anyone?

    Let me start off with , Isn't that just the cutest photo ever!!!

    So at my house we have alot of squirrels in our back yard. Even though we have 3 dogs.

    One would think that the squirrels would see this and say “damn, lets stay the fuck out of that yard”, but NO.

    I am beginning to think they see it instead as a challenge.

    AS they, skurry right up to my freakin back door, and just stand there. Teasing my poor little doggies.

    Standing there flipping their furry little tales back and forth.

    Look at me, look at me.

    Here I am, come see if you can catch me while I run my ass up that tree.

    Come on seriously. Are they that bored that they need to come knocking on MY back door every day, just taunting my little babies?

    I am for real, not obsessed with the squirrels in my yard.
    I hardly pay any attention to them. I just feel bad for my doggies.

    I truly mean them no harm. I can prove it, when we are out driving around , I always swirve to avoid hitting them. So see, I do care about them.

    Anyways my point with this “squirrel” story is. For some reason I got a wild hair up my ass and decided,
    I wanted a stuffed one.
    I am for freakin real. For inside my house.

    Come on don’t look at me that way. I don’t want to go out and kill one.

    Don’t you know there are enough dead ones laying around all over the place due to someone else running them over.
     I better not find out it was the sportsman.

    So I thought why not call one of those guys who stuffs them. What is it again? Taxi something.

    Anyways, I told the sportsman I wanted a stuffed squirrel for inside the house. Of course he thought I was joking. Cause what, I can never be serious.

    I asked him how much he thought it would cost ? If I called one of those taxi places.

    I mean are they in a high demand? No? Would if be cheaper if I personally picked up one off the side of the road and took it in to be stuffed? Not sure how this works exactly.

    I know the sportsman at this point was not taking me seriously. He honest to god thought I was joking.

    I am not joking. I seriously want a stuffed squirrel.

    I think my dogs would totally think it was totally kickass. Their own stuffed squirrel in their very own home. I wonder if what ever it comes mounted on, if you can have a little plaque on there with a name. Cause I will also be naming this stuffed squirrel.

    So the more I talked about it the more the sportsman got pissed. He was irritated that I was still talking about it. 
    I never claimed to be normal. So why would he think this is such an off the wall request?

    Hello, he has known me for over 11 years. He should be used to unusual request from me by now.

    So in order to get my point across I told the sportsman that’s fine, I will ask for it for christmas then. That’s right I only want two things for christmas jackass and one of them in a freakin stuffed squirrel.

    So you better freakin get on it. Sportsman!

    Worst case scenario, I pick one up off the road myself and attempt to stuff it. I mean seriously how hard can it really be?

    I'll keep you posted.
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