Jump on the HAPPY Train

I am sure some of you have probably noticed(you whould have to be blind not to notice) that I haven't been very
 h a p p y  as of late. It’s no big freakin surprise that I have been struggling with “something”.
Just my potty mouth alone should be a huge red flag. Not that I don't have one, I just don't normally let it fly as much as I have been.

Boy, would my mother not be happy with me.



However, I am here today to tell you that I have made a executive decision to get the funk out. I have decided to jump on the “Happy Train”. Can you say it is about damn time!


It’s not that I have been depressed lately, just have been dealing with some really difficult shit.


With the help of some really awesome and very supportive friends, I think it might be possible to get back to my old self.


I have come to this conclusion after a lot of freakin soul searching, and well some /a lot of guilt.


I have spent the last several months just aimlessly wandering. I have gotten off course. I have ignored my family,my dog, I haven't painted in months and I have not been going to church. Some would say that the devil had a little bit of a hand in all this.

I will just say I take full responsibility for my actions and my behavior over the last several months, expecially the last 3 weeks.


It has been extremely tough on the sportsman standing by and watching me self-destruct and not knowing what to do. I am truly sorry for putting him thru all that I have lately. He is a good man that does not deserve how I have been treating him.


So as of now, I am activiely working on my relationship with the sportsman. I’m not gonna lie and say we are good or anywhere close to being great. That takes time right?

I can say that we are working on it. Where ever that takes us, at least I can say that I am making the effort to try and make things right.


The sportsman (only after taking away sex) has finally agreed to go to the doctor for his snoring. I see that as a huge step in the right direction.


So I can't promise you that I will forever be on the “Happy Train” , since as in life there are always ups and downs.

I can however promise you that my posts will be a little more happy to read and as always there will be a little bit of naughty in them. Cannot change what is a huge part of being ME.



So heres to some awesome times in the near future.
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