I am disheartened with my sportsman. I know my frustration isn’t any different than the frustration that many women feel.
I keep reminding myself it’s a “guy” thing or It’s not me, it’s him. I also think it is a “how you were raised” kinda thing or maybe it’s my sportsman is 5 years younger than me???
It has taken me several days to calm down to even write what I am about to write. I’ve been apprehensive, that I would not go about it with a smile on my face or a song in my heart, but rather with extreme animosity. Also with Valentines Day just around the corner, I think it would be crafty of me to “play nice”, with my sportsman.
It’s just so hard sometimes. I know it’s said that, “any good marriage requires hard work”, but what the person who said that doesn’t bother to explain is how hard do you have to work, and what is too hard? Should it be so damn hard that you’re miserable? UGH!
My simple little storey is why I struggle with life with my sportsman.
It all started out a happy go lucky Saturday, my sportsman and I were letting my son drive us around, since he has recently gotten his permit.
We have had previous issues when all of us are in the car, and because of this it has been discussed, that only ONE parent is allowed to do the
So we are heading to do our weekend shopping. My son is driving, we pull into the parking lot and we are trying to find a place to park (without taking out the whole side of the nearest car). Meanwhile my daughter calls, frantic(she is the biggest drama queen, so everything to her is an emergency) she is telling me that her car tire is really low, it won’t fill up, and oh, by the way she is at a gas station that is in the “hood”. I am trying to instruct her and instruct my son on where to park, at the same time my sportsman is also instructing.
At some point I am screaming at my son as to what to do, telling my daughter I will have to call her right back, and telling my sportsman to shut the fuck up!!!!! Yes I said the “F” word in the car in front of my 15 year old. You also don’t have to point out how demeaning it is to say that to the person you are supposed to love.
Listen people it only got worse from here. We park the car and go in to do our shopping. I call my daughter back and now she is pissed at me cause I had to hang up and call her back. She wouldn’t initially even take my call. When she does answer, she yells at me that her being stranded in the “hood” takes precedence over me helping my son park the car.
Let me just say, I don’t deal well with multiple people yelling at me. I have to take a moment to regroup and to think clearly. The long short of it, and many phone calls later, to many people, (don’t even ask) my daughters boyfriends mother, who lives close by came and helped her change out her tire. So she could at least make it home.
So while we are standing in line to check out of Dick’s Sporting Goods, I tell my sportsman that we need to take my daughters car up someplace to get the tire looked at or fixed, since she has work on Sunday.
He turns to me with this dirty look on his face and says “Do you know how long you have to sit at those places and wait for them to fix a tire”? Like what he really was saying was, OMG I have other things I want to do today and the last thing I want to do is sit around some tire shop. I look back and him and I say, seriously, who is the man and who is the women in this family? I will take the fucking car myself and bring along a book. He then tells me, that I should call first cause they may not even be open past 5:00. I look back at him and at this point I am not talking quietly anymore but now rather loudly. Are you fucking kidding me I ask him. It has to get done, so I don’t care what we have to do.
This is where the shit really starts to hit the fan. I’m pretty sure the people standing directly in front of us would have preferred to get the hell away from us as quick as possible. So then my sportsman turns and walks out of the store and leaves me still standing in line
As if it could get any worse, I got stuck paying for my sons two pairs of Under Armour clothes at $114 dollars, so that he can play soccer next week outdoors. If that doesn’t add fury to the fire I don’t know what else would.
Honestly I wasn’t trying to meet some kinda potty mouth word quota for the day. I was just flabbergasted, that here my manly sportsman is not stepping up to the “father” plate. Seriously what the fuck??????
So we make it home, with me driving this time. My son is upset cause we were both yelling in the car and cause I didn’t let him drive home and my sportsman is now royally pissed at me. But I’m on a roll, I am so wound up that I can’t stop now. I continue the yelling and demeaning statements even after we get into the house.
I just wanted to know, why is it that anytime someone needs help my sportsman never volunteers? My sportsman’s reply was, he thought this should be used as a learning lesson. On how to take care of your own car. Does anyone else see an issue with this besides me? One she is a girl, two she is only 19 and three aren’t you suppose to go alone and instruct in order for it to be a “learning Lesson”?
If I am way off base here on all of this, then I will truly apologize to my sportsman in the way I treated him. I know it’s hard for you to give an accurate opinion and/or advice only hearing my side of the story.
So please give advice, I already recognize that I wasn’t pleasant , but I still feel that my sportsman should have stepped it up a notch.
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